[Pak-Media] Valentine's Day and Responsibility of Muslims

VALENTINE'S DAY

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What is it and where did it come from?

St. Valentine's Day: Paganization of Christianity or Christianization of paganism?

Christians were aware of the Pagan roots of Valentine's Day. The way the Christians adopted St. Valentine's Day should be a lesson for Muslims. In fact, the failure to fully separate Valentine's Day from its pagan roots explains why Islamic scholars and a number of Muslims avoid adopting traditions of non-Muslims, even though they could possibly be Islamicized.

The Arabic word Bida means adopting something new as a religious practice into Islam. Bida is a sin in Islam. Muslims should avoid things with unIslamic roots even though they may appear to be innocent.

The history of Valentine's Day serves as a powerful lesson for Muslims. St. Valentine became a Saint trying to resist free sex. Even though there was an attempt to Christianize it, today St. Valentine's day is gone back to its roots. No one even knows that the Church even tried to ban the St. Valentine's Day. Rather, most people think of romance, cupid and his arrow, which are vestiges of pagan Rome.

Pagan origins of Valentine's Day

The first information about this day is found in pre-Christian Rome, when pagans would celebrate the "Feast of the Wolf" on February 15, also known as the Feast of Lupercalius in honor of Februata Juno, the Roman goddess of women and marriage, and Pan, Roman god of nature.

On this day, young women would place their names in an urn, from which boys would randomly draw to discover their sexual companion for the day, the year, and sometimes the rest of their lives. These partners exchanged gifts as a sign of affection, and often married.

Christian Influence

When Christianity came onto the scene in Rome, it wanted to replace this feast with something more in line with its ethics and morality.

A number of Christians decided to use February 14 for this purpose. This was when the Italian Bishop Valentine was executed by the Roman Emperor Claudius II for conducting secret marriages of military men in the year 270.

Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, so he outlawed marriage for young, single men, who made up his military. Valentine defied Claudius and performed marriages for young couples in secret. When his actions were revealed, Claudius put him to death.

Another version of the story says that Valentine was a holy priest in Rome, who helped Christians escape harsh Roman prisons where they were often beaten and tortured.

Valentine was arrested and sent to the prefect of Rome for this. He found that his attempts to make Valentine renounce his faith were useless, and so recommended he be beaten with clubs, and later beheaded. This took place on February 14, 270.

According to the Catholic encyclopedia, there are at least three different Saint Valentines, all of whom are Christian martyrs of February 14.

One of them is described as a priest from Rome (as mentioned above), another as bishop of Interamna (modern Terni), and the third from Africa.

It was in the year 496 that Pope Gelasius officially changed the February 15 Lupercalia festival to the February 14 St. Valentine's Day to give Christian meaning to a pagan festival. The holiday become popular in the United States in the 1800's during the Civil War.

As well, Pope Gelasius ordered a slight change in the lottery for young women that would take place during the pagan festival.

Instead of the names of young women, the box would have the names of saints. Men and women were allowed to draw from the box, and the purpose of this was to copy the ways of the saint they had selected for the rest of the year.

Valentine's Day Customs

A number of the customs connected to Valentine's Day originate in the belief in England and France during the Middle Ages, that on February 14, birds began to pair.

Fourteenth and 15th centuries' French and English literatures make indirect references to the practice.

Those who chose each other as husband and wife on Valentine's Day apparently called each other their Valentines.

In terms of the Valentine's greeting "Your Valentine" which today you find on a number of Valentine's Day cards, the above-mentioned Roman priest Valentine actually sent the first 'valentine' greeting himself.

While he was in prison awaiting execution, he apparently fell in love with a young girl who would visit him. Before he died, he allegedly wrote her a letter, signed 'From your Valentine,'.

In terms of the virtually naked, arrow-shooting cupid character which shoots people with its arrows to make them fall in love, this character is a vestige of Roman pagan times. Cupid was described as the son of Venus, the Roman god of love and beauty. You usually find Cupid's picture on Valentine cards and other paraphernalia.

-Sources of information include: The Catholic Encyclopedia, Catholic Online Saints, http://www.lovestories.com/cupid/history.htm, the History Channel, and wilstar.com and the video Holiday Myths.

http://soundvision.com/valentine/history.shtml

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What happens in a public school on this day?

Valentine's Day on February 14 is just one of the many holidays which are often passed off as harmless and fun.

After all, what happens? In a number of public school classes, kids give each other cards (of course, the most popular kids get the most cards), millions of dollars are spent on chocolate for a girlfriend or wife, or a boyfriend or husband. People pay for classified ads in the special Valentine's Day section of the newspaper, expressing their love for their beloved. And of course, television stations will churn out new or repeated Disney Valentine's Day cartoon specials.

But will it be strong to say that the Valentine's Day is more than just about cards, cartoons and chocolates? It's an initiation into the culture of boyfriends and girlfriends, sex outside of marriage, and the hurtful and often painful dating game!

It's a way to plant the seed of "romance" in the minds of young people, with little or no emphasis on commitment and loyalty through marriage and a stable relationship with the opposite sex.

A day that's a lesson in exclusion

Valentine's Day is also a painful lesson in exclusion for the kids who are not so popular at school. They'll watch their classmates and friends get lots of Valentine's Day cards, while they sit either empty-handed or holding one or two, most probably from kids thoughtful enough to give one to everybody in the class.

What will a child so hurt, rejected or dejected do in this situation? Will he or she perhaps try harder to be somebody's or everybody's special Valentine's next year? And what will they do to become so popular?

Using Valentine's Day hoopla to teach about Islam

For Muslims, the implications of Valentine's Day run even deeper. We have to educate our kids about Halal gender relations, in all that implies.

Muslims are first, brothers and sisters in faith, not sex objects to each other. Islamic rules of modesty and respect between the sexes need to be taught in this culture of low-cut shirts, tight jeans, mini-skirts, short shorts, seduction, phone-sex hotlines and the ever-present sexual humor and situations that pervade most sitcoms and television shows.

But this has to be done with wisdom not dry, boring lectures. Like other aspects of Islam, we have to show that we have the better option.

Romance is a beautiful thing. The real love is not some one-month or summer fling, or a relationship based on looks.

Valentine's Day, like other aspects of this culture needs to be examined and analyzed from an Islamic perspective. This perspective then needs to be clear in our hearts and minds then passed down to our children. Ranting and raving against it is not the solution. Rather, sincere, calm understanding and explanation is what parents and anyone who cares about a Muslim youth, be it a niece, family friend's child or student in an Islamic full-time or weekend school, need to do.

Let's show our kids the true meaning and implications of Valentine's Day. And let's show them that with the Halal alternative, we really have what's best.

Understanding Valentine's Day in the global context

This need to abstain from Valentine's Day is even more important for Muslims in the current global context, where Western secular culture is sneaking into Muslim societies via satellite dishes, television programs and various other forms of very powerful media. Most Muslim countries cannot or are not making enough efforts to resist this cultural onslaught and perhaps don't fully comprehend the serious implications it has on Muslim children, families and gender relations.

http://soundvision.com/valentine/perspective.shtml

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

9 Tips and Ideas for Muslim parents and communities

Valentine's Day needs an Islamic response from Muslim parents, Imams, and communities. Here are some ideas that can help:

1. Have a community information session about it and what goes on in schools

Invite both Muslim parents and teenagers to inform parents about what happens during Valentine's Day in public schools.

In particular, let Muslim teenagers take over the event. Their first-hand experience in public schools with this issue will be stronger testimony about what goes on than any parent who hasn't gone through the same thing.

2. Talk about it in a Khutbah

Imams need to read up on Valentine's Day but don't rant. Explain the pagan origins of the holidays and talk about positive gender relations in Islam.

3. Discuss it in Halaqas for parents

Have one of the parents discuss Valentine's Day in public schools during a Halaqa. In fact, make it a special feature and perhaps come up with a parental strategy for what can be done about it (i.e. how to talk to your kids about it).

4. Discuss it in Islamic full-time and weekend school classes for kids

Kids need to be told about Valentine's Day and given an Islamic perspective. Valentine's Day is often the door that opens up to other unIslamic ideas about men, women, romance, love, marriage, etc.

Have a fun but frank presentation on the topic. Make it interactive. Ask the kids if they have received any Valentine's, how many, do they understand the implications, etc.

5. Talk about the most important love of all

One of the beautiful things about Islam is that when something is prohibited, there is always a better option (Alhamdulillah!!!).

Talk about the love that Valentine's Day doesn't-love for Allah and His Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him).

But tell stories of the Sahabah, don't just make it a dry discussion topic. Show how dedicated they were to Allah and the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him). Talk about how love translates into action, and how the behavior of these early Muslims showed their love. You can, for instance, do a presentation on one of the Sahabas as written about in Companions of the Prophet by Abdul Wahid Hamid.

6. Send a "Just say no to Valentine's Day" card to Muslim relatives abroad where the fashion of Valentine's Day is going on.

If you have the Internet at home, get the kids to send their friends Sound Vision's Just Say No to Valentine's Day cards located at:
http://www.soundvision.com/cards/index04.shtml

This way, they can send a powerful message to other kids about true love.

7. Avoid the consumer madness-don't buy special candy and chocolate for this day.

While the shiny red boxes of chocolate are tempting, avoid buying candy commemorating the event. Save your money for now, and go on a candy splurge for Eid- ul-Adha in March, Insha-Allah.

8. Talk to them about Muslim festivals

Remind your kids about the two Muslim festivals of Eid-ul-Fitr and Eid-ul-Adha. If you made Eid-ul-Fitr special for your kids this month, recall the memories. If not, start planning for Eid-ul Adha.

http://soundvision.com/valentine/9tips.shtml 

 

VALENTINE'S DAY

 

---

What is it and where did it come from?

 

St. Valentine's Day: Paganization of Christianity or Christianization of paganism?

 

Christians were aware of the Pagan roots of Valentine's Day. The way the Christians adopted St. Valentine's Day should be a lesson for Muslims. In fact, the failure to fully separate Valentine's Day from its pagan roots explains why Islamic scholars and a number of Muslims avoid adopting traditions of non-Muslims, even though they could possibly be Islamicized.

 

The Arabic word Bida means adopting something new as a religious practice into Islam. Bida is a sin in Islam. Muslims should avoid things with unIslamic roots even though they may appear to be innocent.

 

The history of Valentine's Day serves as a powerful lesson for Muslims. St. Valentine became a Saint trying to resist free sex. Even though there was an attempt to Christianize it, today St. Valentine's day is gone back to its roots. No one even knows that the Church even tried to ban the St. Valentine's Day. Rather, most people think of romance, cupid and his arrow, which are vestiges of pagan Rome.

 

Pagan origins of Valentine's Day

 

The first information about this day is found in pre-Christian Rome, when pagans would celebrate the "Feast of the Wolf" on February 15, also known as the Feast of Lupercalius in honor of Februata Juno, the Roman goddess of women and marriage, and Pan, Roman god of nature.

 

On this day, young women would place their names in an urn, from which boys would randomly draw to discover their sexual companion for the day, the year, and sometimes the rest of their lives. These partners exchanged gifts as a sign of affection, and often married.

 

Christian Influence

 

When Christianity came onto the scene in Rome, it wanted to replace this feast with something more in line with its ethics and morality.

 

A number of Christians decided to use February 14 for this purpose. This was when the Italian Bishop Valentine was executed by the Roman Emperor Claudius II for conducting secret marriages of military men in the year 270.

 

Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, so he outlawed marriage for young, single men, who made up his military. Valentine defied Claudius and performed marriages for young couples in secret. When his actions were revealed, Claudius put him to death.

 

Another version of the story says that Valentine was a holy priest in Rome, who helped Christians escape harsh Roman prisons where they were often beaten and tortured.

 

Valentine was arrested and sent to the prefect of Rome for this. He found that his attempts to make Valentine renounce his faith were useless, and so recommended he be beaten with clubs, and later beheaded. This took place on February 14, 270.

 

According to the Catholic encyclopedia, there are at least three different Saint Valentines, all of whom are Christian martyrs of February 14.

 

One of them is described as a priest from Rome (as mentioned above), another as bishop of Interamna (modern Terni), and the third from Africa.

 

It was in the year 496 that Pope Gelasius officially changed the February 15 Lupercalia festival to the February 14 St. Valentine's Day to give Christian meaning to a pagan festival. The holiday become popular in the United States in the 1800's during the Civil War.

 

As well, Pope Gelasius ordered a slight change in the lottery for young women that would take place during the pagan festival.

 

Instead of the names of young women, the box would have the names of saints. Men and women were allowed to draw from the box, and the purpose of this was to copy the ways of the saint they had selected for the rest of the year.

 

Valentine's Day Customs

 

A number of the customs connected to Valentine's Day originate in the belief in England and France during the Middle Ages, that on February 14, birds began to pair.

 

Fourteenth and 15th centuries' French and English literatures make indirect references to the practice.

 

Those who chose each other as husband and wife on Valentine's Day apparently called each other their Valentines.

 

In terms of the Valentine's greeting "Your Valentine" which today you find on a number of Valentine's Day cards, the above-mentioned Roman priest Valentine actually sent the first 'valentine' greeting himself.

 

While he was in prison awaiting execution, he apparently fell in love with a young girl who would visit him. Before he died, he allegedly wrote her a letter, signed 'From your Valentine,'.

 

In terms of the virtually naked, arrow-shooting cupid character which shoots people with its arrows to make them fall in love, this character is a vestige of Roman pagan times. Cupid was described as the son of Venus, the Roman god of love and beauty. You usually find Cupid's picture on Valentine cards and other paraphernalia.

 

-Sources of information include: The Catholic Encyclopedia, Catholic Online Saints, http://www.lovestories.com/cupid/history.htm, the History Channel, and wilstar.com and the video Holiday Myths.

 

http://soundvision.com/valentine/history.shtml

---

What happens in a public school on this day?

 

Valentine's Day on February 14 is just one of the many holidays which are often passed off as harmless and fun.

 

After all, what happens? In a number of public school classes, kids give each other cards (of course, the most popular kids get the most cards), millions of dollars are spent on chocolate for a girlfriend or wife, or a boyfriend or husband. People pay for classified ads in the special Valentine's Day section of the newspaper, expressing their love for their beloved. And of course, television stations will churn out new or repeated Disney Valentine's Day cartoon specials.

 

But will it be strong to say that the Valentine's Day is more than just about cards, cartoons and chocolates? It's an initiation into the culture of boyfriends and girlfriends, sex outside of marriage, and the hurtful and often painful dating game!

 

It's a way to plant the seed of "romance" in the minds of young people, with little or no emphasis on commitment and loyalty through marriage and a stable relationship with the opposite sex.

 

A day that's a lesson in exclusion

 

Valentine's Day is also a painful lesson in exclusion for the kids who are not so popular at school. They'll watch their classmates and friends get lots of Valentine's Day cards, while they sit either empty-handed or holding one or two, most probably from kids thoughtful enough to give one to everybody in the class.

 

What will a child so hurt, rejected or dejected do in this situation? Will he or she perhaps try harder to be somebody's or everybody's special Valentine's next year? And what will they do to become so popular?

 

Using Valentine's Day hoopla to teach about Islam

 

For Muslims, the implications of Valentine's Day run even deeper. We have to educate our kids about Halal gender relations, in all that implies.

 

Muslims are first, brothers and sisters in faith, not sex objects to each other. Islamic rules of modesty and respect between the sexes need to be taught in this culture of low-cut shirts, tight jeans, mini-skirts, short shorts, seduction, phone-sex hotlines and the ever-present sexual humor and situations that pervade most sitcoms and television shows.

 

But this has to be done with wisdom not dry, boring lectures. Like other aspects of Islam, we have to show that we have the better option.

 

Romance is a beautiful thing. The real love is not some one-month or summer fling, or a relationship based on looks.

 

Valentine's Day, like other aspects of this culture needs to be examined and analyzed from an Islamic perspective. This perspective then needs to be clear in our hearts and minds then passed down to our children. Ranting and raving against it is not the solution. Rather, sincere, calm understanding and explanation is what parents and anyone who cares about a Muslim youth, be it a niece, family friend's child or student in an Islamic full-time or weekend school, need to do.

 

Let's show our kids the true meaning and implications of Valentine's Day. And let's show them that with the Halal alternative, we really have what's best.

 

Understanding Valentine's Day in the global context

 

This need to abstain from Valentine's Day is even more important for Muslims in the current global context, where Western secular culture is sneaking into Muslim societies via satellite dishes, television programs and various other forms of very powerful media. Most Muslim countries cannot or are not making enough efforts to resist this cultural onslaught and perhaps don't fully comprehend the serious implications it has on Muslim children, families and gender relations.

 

http://soundvision.com/valentine/perspective.shtml

---

9 Tips and Ideas for Muslim parents and communities

 

Valentine's Day needs an Islamic response from Muslim parents, Imams, and communities. Here are some ideas that can help:

 

1. Have a community information session about it and what goes on in schools

 

Invite both Muslim parents and teenagers to inform parents about what happens during Valentine's Day in public schools.

 

In particular, let Muslim teenagers take over the event. Their first-hand experience in public schools with this issue will be stronger testimony about what goes on than any parent who hasn't gone through the same thing.

 

2. Talk about it in a Khutbah

 

Imams need to read up on Valentine's Day but don't rant. Explain the pagan origins of the holidays and talk about positive gender relations in Islam.

 

3. Discuss it in Halaqas for parents

 

Have one of the parents discuss Valentine's Day in public schools during a Halaqa. In fact, make it a special feature and perhaps come up with a parental strategy for what can be done about it (i.e. how to talk to your kids about it).

 

4. Discuss it in Islamic full-time and weekend school classes for kids

 

Kids need to be told about Valentine's Day and given an Islamic perspective. Valentine's Day is often the door that opens up to other unIslamic ideas about men, women, romance, love, marriage, etc.

 

Have a fun but frank presentation on the topic. Make it interactive. Ask the kids if they have received any Valentine's, how many, do they understand the implications, etc.

 

5. Talk about the most important love of all

 

One of the beautiful things about Islam is that when something is prohibited, there is always a better option (Alhamdulillah!!!).

 

Talk about the love that Valentine's Day doesn't-love for Allah and His Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him).

 

But tell stories of the Sahabah, don't just make it a dry discussion topic. Show how dedicated they were to Allah and the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him). Talk about how love translates into action, and how the behavior of these early Muslims showed their love. You can, for instance, do a presentation on one of the Sahabas as written about in Companions of the Prophet by Abdul Wahid Hamid.

 

6. Send a "Just say no to Valentine's Day" card to Muslim relatives abroad where the fashion of Valentine's Day is going on.

 

If you have the Internet at home, get the kids to send their friends Sound Vision's Just Say No to Valentine's Day cards located at:

http://www.soundvision.com/cards/index04.shtml

 

 

This way, they can send a powerful message to other kids about true love.

 

7. Avoid the consumer madness-don't buy special candy and chocolate for this day.

 

While the shiny red boxes of chocolate are tempting, avoid buying candy commemorating the event. Save your money for now, and go on a candy splurge for Eid- ul-Adha in March, Insha-Allah.

 

8. Talk to them about Muslim festivals

 

Remind your kids about the two Muslim festivals of Eid-ul-Fitr and Eid-ul-Adha. If you made Eid-ul-Fitr special for your kids this month, recall the memories. If not, start planning for Eid-ul Adha.

 

http://soundvision.com/valentine/9tips.shtml

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Tariq Khattak, Islamabad, Pakistan.
GSM = 0300-9599007 and  0333-9599007
Email: Tariqgulkhattak@gmail.com

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